If you have your eye on an older man, there are a few things you should know before getting too involved. While dating older men can be exciting and enlightening, it can also throw up a few challenges you haven’t experienced in other relationships.
There’s no need to fear dating older men, though, as it can enrich your life in ways you never imagined. Just make sure you go into a new relationship with your eyes wide open.
Father time catches up on all of us. Simple biology comes into play here: a 20-year-old is usually going to have a lot more energy than a 50-year-old. While you might want to play sports and stay active throughout the day, and older guy might be more content with gentle walks and cosy nights in.
A mature guy will bear the scars of many old relationships and break-ups. He may therefore be skilled at protecting himself from heartache and disappointment.
You, on the other hand, may be optimistic and more open-minded about new relationships. Don’t think that your older man isn’t as invested in the relationship as you are because he’s being more guarded with his emotions.
An older man probably has a large social circle featuring friends of a similar age. As you’re entering into a relationship with him, you will be mixing with these people too.
They may have very different interests to your own, which is something you should prepare for in advance. But who knows? You might actually enjoy spending time with people you wouldn’t normally mix with.
EXPERT TIP: Set aside specific times of the week during which you can both go out with your own friends. Your older man won’t want to spend all of his social life with people much younger than him, and you probably feel the same about his older friends. A little time apart will give you both something to talk about later on.
And after all: absence usually makes the heart grow fonder.
Simple biology tells us that older men usually don’t have the same definition and tone in their bodies as younger guys have.
If this is important to you, dating older men may not be for you. Either way, don’t expect a musclebound superhero in the bedroom.
It is inevitable that an older man will have had previous relationships, and even previous wives. As a result, you will need to live with the fact that you aren’t your partner’s first love.
There will be lots of shared memories and experiences between your older man and his previous partners, and that’s just something you will need to learn to live with.
A man of a certain age will probably have had several sexual partners over the course of his life. As a result, he will know a thing or two about what women like in the bedroom.
While this might be a little intimidating at times, it might also mean that he’s in tune with your sexual needs.
And who knows? You might learn a few things along the way!
One of the main advantages associated with dating older men relates to their life experience and education. And rather than seeking fun and self-gratification at every opportunity, your older man may want to explore the arts.
His love of music, film, theatre and art may not sound like your cup of tea at first, but it might inspire you to explore your own cultural preferences. You might also discover a few things about yourself.
Younger couples tend to play emotional games with one another to test traits such as loyalty, respect and jealousy. But a man who has lived a life and experienced many different types of relationship won’t have time for such games.
He will be more in tune with how short life is, and he’ll probably want to savour every moment of it. He will know that mind games usually end badly, so he won’t engage in them. And if you try to, he might just tell you to play them with someone else!
There is no reason why dating older men should end badly for you. Of course, an age gap may lead to some teething problems during the early stages of your relationship. But by knowing what makes to expect from the outset, you can prepare yourself for the challenges that lie ahead.